*That’s the title of a recent Deborah Norville book about the power of saying “thank you” but every time I see that title, I put an invisible comma between the last two words and read it as her thanking power. I’m not sure what kind of power, be it political, electrical or higher, but it cracks me up.
Speaking of thanks, I want to rehash something I heard years ago on NPR. (I can’t find a source.) I was thinking about it because I keep thinking “thank you” to all the people who have supported me in my quest to raise money for The River Pool. Big thanks to everyone, because I made it to $100 by the deadline! Now to see if I make it to the $200 mark…
One time, on NPR, I heard a guy talking about what to say when someone says “thank you.” His conclusion was the only proper response is “you’re welcome.” To say that someone is welcome means that the favor was gladly received, and that the gratitude of the person receiving the gesture is accepted.
If you say, “don’t mention it,” that’s a command telling the person they shouldn’t have said what they just said.
If you say, “it was no problem,” you’re implying that the favor was a problem, but now you’re denying it.
If you say, “no thanks are needed, I was glad to do it,” you’re saying that you would have done it anyway, and the person’s thanks are superfluous.
If you say, “forget it,” you’re brushing off the other person.
If you say, “no, thank you,” you’re deflecting the gesture, speeding up the exchange, and making it about you.
If you say, “my pleasure,” it sounds like you only did the favor so you could get something out of it.
But when you take that extra moment to say, “you’re welcome,” you telling the other person you accept their thanks, and that person has been gladly received. It’s not only the best response, it’s the only one. And I think of that every time someone says thank you and I completely forget the rule until a moment too late. I’m a “no problem” kid, with the exception of when someone says, “thank you very much” and I say, “you’re welcome very much.”
