Every year, I feel like there are two chances for a new beginning. One is in January, when the year flips and I turn a year older. The other is in September when pools mysteriously close even though it’s still pretty damn hot outside, and all the stores are selling sweaters even though it’s still pretty damn hot outside, and I have an unexplained desire to buy new notebooks and folders even though I haven’t needed a notebook or a folder in almost a decade.
Maybe it was the desire for new beginnings that prompted my decision on Saturday to move out of the cottage on the Christmas tree farm.
Or maybe it was that I found out the landlesbian took a bunch of my mail and held it hostage in her home.
Possibly also when I was awakened at 4:00am with the sound of her yelling incoherently on the front porch, and the fact that she continued to yell for the next three hours.
Having the cops come to the farm twice because she dialed 911 on herself while trying to call New York City was also a bit of a reality check.
And then, on Saturday when I opened the mail that she had hidden and it was a letter from the oil company notifying me that my monthly oil charge is now $325 a month, more than double the cost to heat the drafty-ass cottage last winter, I knew that there was no time like the present to get the hell out of there.
Luckily, an apartment complex very close to my work had a vacant apartment and an office that was open on the Saturday of Labor Day weekend. I checked out the place, and it’s just fine. It’s a one-bedroom with even floors and ceilings, modern appliances and a professional maintenance staff that is made up of more than “the waterlesbian, when she’s around.” It reminds me of a really nice dorm with not much personality, but after these past few months of crazy, I’ve had enough personality.
But the big question: do I keep calling this blog The Daily Tannenbaum even if I’m nowhere near a Christmas tree farm?
Absolutely.
For one, How Many of Me says that there are no other Noelle Tannenbaums in the America. (Thank you, parents of this great nation for not putting your daughter through the pain of a name that means Christmas Christmas Tree!) Also, I like it, even if it no longer has a literal meaning. To keep hold of my roots, I plan on having potted evergreen on hand for remembrance’s sake.
As for the pros and cons… The new place is only fifteen minutes away, but I’ll be in a new congressional district, and I’ll no longer be eligible to go to the local lake that I just learned about and enjoyed this summer. (You have to show proof of address that you live in a particular neighborhood.) It’s eight minutes further from New York City, but I’ll try not to dwell on that. It’s about 200 square feet smaller than the cottage, but about 400 square feet of the cottage is unusable because the floors and ceilings are so slanted. The new apartment is closer to the gym and closer to the pool, and closer to the coffee shop. However, I’ll have internet access in the new apartment, so I won’t need to run to the coffee shop every day. Like the farm, it’s exactly eight minutes from work, but I won’t get to coast to work in neutral on my favorite road anymore, and I’ll have to navigate eight traffic lights on the way there instead of two. But if I decide to fix up my bike and ride it to work, it’s pretty flat both to and from the apartment.
Most importantly, I’ll have a landcorporation instead of a landlesbian, and that’s why I made a snap judgment to move there. John McCain took more time vetting his VP choice than I did mulling over the decision to move. But then again, my luggage has been to more foreign countries than Sarah Palin. I don’t really know what that means. But it’s true.
The biggest drawback I see to this scenario other than having to pack, move, and owe my friends a favor after they help me lift my furniture, is that I’m still between a rock and a hard place with the cats. I’ve tried to find a new home for poor adorable Lucy, who is gets attacked by Micki and then pees on my stuff. As you can imagine, I’d prefer not to have cat pee anywhere at the new place. The vet has given me some anti-anxiety medication for Micki, but if it works, it will take at least a few weeks. And in the new place, the only closed rooms are the bathroom, which is too small for a cat, and the bedroom, where I would decidedly not like to house a litter box. Whatever happens, be assured I’ll update you here at the Daily Tannenbaum.
And just for kicks, I’m now going to leave you with a video of what the road away from the Christmas tree farm looks like. This video is really for my own edification, because I love that I’ve perfected the art of driving on this windy downhill road to the point where once I get the car up to 45 MPH, I don’t need to hit the gas or the brakes until I get to the traffic light two minutes later. I’m going to miss that drive.
Posted by 3carnations on September 3, 2008 at 11:56 am
It sounds like you’re getting out while the getting’s good – Landlesbian seems to have really gone a bit off the deep end.
Good luck with your move.
Thanks!
Posted by cadiz12 on September 3, 2008 at 12:07 pm
I’m glad you’re keeping the name. it’s no longer about the location; you’ve made it your own.
There’s a time for every purpose. All the best!
I’m all about keeping my name. In many ways.
Posted by The Modern Gal on September 3, 2008 at 12:10 pm
I can see why you’ll miss that drive.
I hate that you’re having to give up a cool place, but it seems to be the right decision. Maybe you’ll have a neighborlesbian at your new apt.
A neighborlesbian would be great!
Posted by The Modern Gal on September 3, 2008 at 12:11 pm
P.S. I just hope this won’t be like when sitcoms decide to leave their usual setting and take a trip to Hawaii. Hawaii was a metaphor for cancellation.
I’d like to think of this more as a spin-off than jumping the shark.
Posted by greenpam on September 3, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Congrats on the decision! I think you’ll find plenty of new adventures with landcorporation. Sorry to hear you’ve had to deal with landlesbian craziness.
How soon till your move?
It’s underway already!
Posted by deutlich on September 3, 2008 at 12:12 pm
that really IS one sweet drive.. I’d miss it too
I may just go back for old time’s sake.
Posted by Jennifer M. on September 3, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Congrats on the new home. The act of moving is never that much fun, but it’s nice to be somewhere new every once in a while. And on-call maintenance rocks!
I don’t really mind moving that much if it means I’m going to get rid of some extraneous stuff.
Posted by -R- on September 3, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Congrats on the new place! I am sure the landcorporation will create some interesting, although not as outlandish, stories.
I’m sorry to hear about the landlesbian. And about how difficult it is dealing with her.
I just keep telling myself it’s almost over.
Posted by courtney on September 3, 2008 at 1:13 pm
I think you made the right decision. The landlesbian sounds like she’s lost it completely.
But more importantly, $325 a month to heat the place?!? That is insane! Apartments are way more efficient.
Apartments are. Especially if they were built after 1875.
Posted by apollocreed on September 3, 2008 at 1:18 pm
Oh damn, I loved that line about Palin and your luggage. Nice.
It’s funny because it’s true.
Posted by Dutchess of Kickball on September 3, 2008 at 1:59 pm
It’s official, I will watch ANYTHING on the internet. I’ve only driven down that road a thousand times but yet had to watch the video of it too.
I know. I watched it more than once myself. It’s kind of hypnotic.
Posted by Regular_Lady on September 3, 2008 at 2:53 pm
Glad you decided to make the move. In reading your blog, it sounded more and more that you were not really able to *live* live at the cottage. Having to be conscious about when you peeked yourself out the front door – and having apprehension about even popping home for lunch? No way to live!
Especially without The Inter-Net.
{{la la la…don’t mind me…I’ve been reading your blog for some months now and thoroughly enjoy it. The link titled “The Daily Tannenbaum” from Allie’s Answers is what drew me in – happy you’re keeping the name!}}
Well welcome to the Daily T! I think the move was a long time coming, but the decision was kind of instant.
Posted by Kelli on September 3, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Wow! So I was right about the moving part…just not the location side of it.
Congrats on the move though. I rented through a management company in one of my (million) apartments and they were the best…always had someone there the minute there was a leaky pipe, heating issues, etc.
When I was signing the lease, I saw them a couple of times, and they look like efficient people. Yeay!
Posted by Sarah on September 3, 2008 at 3:24 pm
Wow, big changes afoot! Hope the transition goes smoothly, and you get the cat situation straightened out.
Thanks! Me too, seriously.
Posted by Hope on September 3, 2008 at 3:30 pm
Sorry things are so crazy round the tree farm- it sounds like you made a good decision. I would offer to help lift boxes if I were anywhere near you- but unfortunately I don’t and will just have to send you good moving vibes from far away.
Here’s to September changes and Less Crazy Places to Dwell!
Maybe you can just lift a box for me in spirit then.
Posted by verybadcat on September 3, 2008 at 3:46 pm
Killer commute.
I have a similar road that I travel to work everyday, and if some stupid dump truck gets in front of me, I go nuts.
Saw your comment on NOR- don’t worry about me. That was kind of an inside joke that started when he announced his Facebook stalker.
Do you have an RSS feed I’m missing?
Oh yeah, I can’t do that drive if it’s school bus time or something.
Posted by verybadcat on September 3, 2008 at 3:51 pm
Found it! Sorry.
No probs. I keep it under the “meta” section.
Posted by Stefanie on September 3, 2008 at 4:15 pm
I wish I had a commute that looks that relaxing.
I agree the move is probably for the best, though I will miss the stories about the charms of the cottage.
Also, I am apparently the only Stefanie [Lastname] in the U.S. If I were named Stephanie [Lastname], however, there would be three of us. (I wonder how accurate that really is…)
There are 581 of me with my real name.
Posted by lizgwiz on September 3, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Oh, I’m so sorry the landlesbian went off the deep end. I loved the stories of your cottage life. Somehow, though, I feel sure that your apartment life will be blogworthy, as well.
I hope it will, if my writing is worth its salt.
Posted by nancypearlwannabe on September 3, 2008 at 4:48 pm
I will miss the stories of your landlesbian, but maybe your new building peeps will provide you with blog fodder of the non-insane type.
There’s 215 units in the complex, I’m sure I can scrounge up at least one crazy.
Posted by mickey on September 3, 2008 at 5:12 pm
That was fun riding along with Tannenbaum. Good job on the coasting.
And good luck with the new place. I’ll miss your descriptions of wintertime in the cottage, but that oil cost is ridiculous. To a new era!
I’m looking forward to the first year where I don’t have to line my windows with plastic!
Posted by Aaron on September 3, 2008 at 6:41 pm
Well congratu-damn-lations. It’s about time. Sleep easy in the knowledge that you will always be Christmas Chiristmas Tree, farm or no.
If I have your approval on keeping the name, then all is well.
Posted by faith on September 3, 2008 at 7:05 pm
Like the blog!
newbie here.
-Faith
Thanks! Welcome! I hope I don’t scare you off with the most recent post…
Posted by Adorable Girlfriend on September 3, 2008 at 11:17 pm
Wow! That is all kinds of crazy with the landlady. I think you made the best decision and hope that your new home is the best thing that happens to you this side of September.
Good luck with the move!!
I think I did too. New beginnings feel so good!
Posted by Dingo on September 4, 2008 at 12:55 am
Sounds like your new place has a lot going for it. When’s the house warming?
As soon as I procure a kitchen table.
Posted by erikka on September 4, 2008 at 10:40 am
Wow. Congratulations and such on the new big changes. I’ll miss picturing your perfect sounding yard and small town. Now it’s like your turning into the “Cosmo Noelle Tannenbaum.”
Posted by bing on September 5, 2008 at 7:25 pm
I think I know exactly where you live(d). We got our Christmas tree from that farm our first year in Po’town.
I used to live in the neighborhood next to the elementary school…in a bright blue house. So I was pretty familiar with that drive too!
Congrats on the new place!
Posted by Vanessa on September 6, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Wow, big news! Congratulations on the new place and hopefully things work out with the kitties. I know the landlesbian made good blog fodder but taking your mail is a federal offense. I would have moved just as fast.
Posted by Kristabella on September 10, 2008 at 2:03 pm
Congrats on the move! I think it was time. Who holds mail hostage? WHO DOES THAT?
Maybe you could not change your address on your license so you could still go to the lake? Or bribe someone?
Posted by Allie on September 13, 2008 at 6:46 pm
Congrats on the new place! Sorry to hear things got a bit hairy there for awhile.
I lived in a nice clean place with a maintenance team and little in the way of character for a few years. You know, I still miss it. Everything worked.
Hope you’re feeling settled in now!