Mom, I love you, but I have to share this phone conversation from the other night.
“Hi honey, how’s everything?”
“Stuff’s good. I went on a date the other night!”
“That’s great! Tell me something about him.”
“Well, he seems like a good guy. I think he’s younger, but I’m not sure what his age is exactly.”
“It’s okay if he’s younger, that makes you the cougar.”
“Well, I don’t think he’s that much younger, just a little.”
“Still, it’s good to be the cougar if you can.”
“It’s not that I intend to or anything.”
“You know, I’m a month older than Dad, that makes me the cougar in our relationship, and look how well we turned out.”
“I don’t think it counts when you’re only a month older.”
“I think it’s a good thing to be a cougar. It’s very sexy.”
“Mom, did you by any chance recently learn the alternate definition to the word cougar?”
“In fact, just yesterday.”
“I’m proud of you Mom. Now please never use that word again unless we’re talking about a nature show or the zoo, and I will still give you credit for knowing that Phish starts with a ‘P.’”
(One time in the late 90′s we were playing Scategories as a family and the letter was ‘P’ and my mom guessed “Phish” under the category “band names.” That gave her a free pass on pop culture until pretty much now.)
UPDATE: Just came along this related article in my feed reading. I’m trendy!
Posted by Megan on July 23, 2008 at 9:20 am
My mom currently has a pop culture pass because she knew that George Michael used to be in Wham. I was truly amazed that she knew that.
Also, I love the “related posts” today
Every time I think I want to get rid of “related posts,” they do something like that.
Posted by Dutchess of Kickball on July 23, 2008 at 9:23 am
Oh, mom, so proud!
She’s the best.
Posted by 3carnations on July 23, 2008 at 9:24 am
That is hilarious. I’m 2 and a half years older than hubby. I guess that makes me the cougar, but I think I’d like it better coming from your mom than saying it myself.
Did you warn her that you’d be blogging about this?
Pretty much the second we finished the conversation. But that was two nights ago, so I bet she thought she was off the hook.
Posted by lizgwiz on July 23, 2008 at 9:50 am
Your mom sounds adorable. I’m pretty sure my mother would be clueless on the Phish issue, and probably the cougar issue, as well.
Posted by nancypearlwannabe on July 23, 2008 at 9:56 am
Your mom is awesome. And totally a cougar.
Posted by bing on July 23, 2008 at 10:10 am
Your mom sounds hilarious. All I can say is, rawr!
Posted by SisterAlyson on July 23, 2008 at 10:22 am
You should have been there when she learned the word “Bling.” It’s all I heard for a month straight.
Posted by elizabeth on July 23, 2008 at 10:59 am
GRRRRRR……………..
I could say I’m the cat’s pajamas but that’s really dating myself and I have no idea what that means.
Posted by Poppy on July 23, 2008 at 11:02 am
My mom will never, ever use the term cougar in the older woman gets younger man sense.
That definition annoys snot out of me that I don’t actually possess.
(My boyfriend is 22 days older, so I am not a cougar, he is a cradle robber.)
Posted by thecoconutdiaries on July 23, 2008 at 11:13 am
My brother and I laughed for an hour before we could even begin explaining what “Superman that ho” means to my father.
Posted by apollocreed on July 23, 2008 at 11:17 am
You are such a trend setter! Tell me what to wear next month.
Please!
Posted by The Modern Gal on July 23, 2008 at 11:40 am
Ha ha ha ha. I think by definition a cougar has to be at least a decade older … maybe more. But I like her definition, cause that would make me a coug too.
Posted by Kristabella on July 23, 2008 at 11:49 am
My mom wants to go to Cougar Night at a local bar.
So I just plug my ears and say lalalala and tell her to have a good time and NOT TELL ME ABOUT IT.
Posted by Allie on July 23, 2008 at 11:55 am
Oh, your mom is awesome! That’s hysterical.
I’m 2 years older than the hubs. I’m going to tell him that I want to be referred to as a cougar from now on.
Posted by Laurel on July 23, 2008 at 12:10 pm
Dr. Phil had a show about COUGARS last Friday. When did that word become used for ALL relationships where the woman is older?
I thought it was older women who were on the prowl!
(Maybe your mom is on the prowl for your much-younger dad. I shouldn’t judge.)
Posted by -R- on July 23, 2008 at 12:43 pm
Elizabeth, when are you starting your own blog to tell us embarrassing things about Noelle?
Posted by freeandflawed on July 23, 2008 at 1:35 pm
Hahaha I <3 that your mom used “cougar” in nearly every sentence!
Posted by erikka on July 23, 2008 at 2:55 pm
wow! you’re mom should start a group for married women who still want to be some type of ‘cougar.’
awesome that she worked the word in that much in the conversation too…kudos to her.
Posted by Adorable Girlfriend on July 23, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Dating. Goodness gracious. Pack some Pepto and hang on tight, Sally!
I heart your Mom.
Posted by courtney on July 23, 2008 at 3:25 pm
I wish “cougar” would die already. And I think you’re right — it doesn’t apply unless the woman is significantly older. Still, impressive that your mom knew Phish.
Posted by Jules on July 23, 2008 at 8:40 pm
I love Mom conversations. Mine are always full of mis used metaphors. I swear it’s because my Mom spent years living in weird places with her army dad… but it’s still priceless, everytime.
Posted by alexa on July 23, 2008 at 9:56 pm
at least you are going on dates! LOL
cougar it up girlfriend!
Posted by Arr on July 23, 2008 at 10:10 pm
I thought the definition of a cougar was a woman over 35 who went after younger men? Having just turned 34, I am invested in this issue, as I do NOT want to be called a cougar before my time.
Posted by stefanie on July 24, 2008 at 11:33 am
I think we’re well overdue for another guest post from your mom.
Also, my head just exploded a little envisioning any tiny portion of that conversation with my own mom.
Posted by Dingo on July 24, 2008 at 1:24 pm
Yes, I think your mom should post about her cougar exploits.
Posted by kir on July 24, 2008 at 8:56 pm
i guess i’m a cougar… here me roar.