I would have made a super secret agent if only I had thought to pursue International Espionage.
But for the fact that I get the giggles whenever I’m nervous or sneaking up on someone, that is.
I believe this to be true because I have noticed that people who have met me before don’t remember doing it, and people that have never met me are sure that we’ve met before.
In fact, one time I almost got into an altercation with a woman at a candle party who was so certain that she knew me, she implied that I was lying about my past. The only possible way she could have known me was if she saw me on episode 209 of Rescue Me where I get 1 second of screen time playing the girl on the website of an anti-depressant. (I got conned into that non-paying gig by the art department who came over to me at my desk and said that I was “the most attractive girl in the locations department.” I was also the only girl in the locations department at the time, but you all know that I have no problem with default.)
Speaking of the swim meet (and if I wasn’t clear on my last post, I was 100% happy with my times) there were two kids there, the sons of my creationist (YIKES!) teammate. They were cute as anything, despite the cruel home-schooling way they’re being raised, and they BOTH kept telling me that they knew me from somewhere. Every time I saw them it was like, “do you go to our church?” “were you at the picnic last summer?” “are you from Ohio?” One thing’s for sure, they didn’t see me in episode 209 of Rescue Me, because they only watch shows and movies that get 5 star ratings from the Family Council. (You should have seen the looks of shock on their little faces when they found out I saw Sex and The City, which got ZERO stars!)
Then last night, I went to a swing dance class at the local coffee shop. It’s the second time I’ve been there for the free lessons on the basic steps.
I got my coffee and was waiting for the class to start. The instructor came over and shook my hand saying, “so nice to meet you, I’m so-and-so, what’s your name?”
And I’m all, “Noelle, I was here two weeks ago. Also, I spoke to you at kickball last Thursday.” She just stared at me blankly like I was lying. There wasn’t even the slightest flicker of recognition on her face. So if I was a spy, I could have staked her out for weeks, and she never would have known.
It’s too bad that I really like my job with books, otherwise I’d be double-oh-Tannenbaum.
21 responses so far ↓
3carnations // June 25, 2008 at 9:16 am
I’m pretty sure I blogged about this when it happened, but a couple months ago someone came in to my work who had not been here in about 10 years. He had not yet identified himself, but he kept trying to figure out where he knew me from. When he finally said his name, and I realized who he was, I said “You know me from here.”
That’s pretty funny!
Allie // June 25, 2008 at 10:07 am
I have the same thing happen. And it’s weird how people will argue you about it. Like the kid at the natural foods store who swears I went to religious summer camp with him in New Hampshire. For some reason saying that I never went to religious summer came isn’t the end of the argument. I get “Are you sure? Because, I really . . . .” Grrr. And then he must forget, because we’ve had the same conversation three times. I don’t get it. I don’t forget people like that.
Someone should save those poor children. Give them a copy of Big Top PeeWee or something.
I wonder what the Family Council rated that one!
The Modern Gal // June 25, 2008 at 10:11 am
Are you sure you don’t have multiple personality disorder?
Are any of us really ever sure?
alexa // June 25, 2008 at 10:19 am
im liking double o tannenbaum!
my favorite day drink is double o 7’s…. mmmm i wish i was drinking one right now.
and as for the lady not remembering you?? you just gotta work it more for her, or not. ha
Mmmmm drinking.
beej // June 25, 2008 at 11:02 am
I’m going to have your synchronized swimming subject line in my head for the rest of the day!
I’m not much of a swimmer.
Thank you for getting that. It’s been in my head, too.
lizgwiz // June 25, 2008 at 11:05 am
People are always thinking they’ve met me, too. I usually assume they’ve seen me in a play, but we can never pin that down. “No, I didn’t see that one, I didn’t see that one, or that one…wait, you were in THAT one!” “No, I wasn’t.” “Hmm…” Perhaps I don’t have quite the star power I think I have. Hee.
Sometimes it’s best to just direct them to IMDB.
Laurel // June 25, 2008 at 12:30 pm
That is always the way it goes. I have a pretty good memory, too, and it is very hard for me to be gracious when someone doesn’t recognize me.
I have the urge to be all like, “Yes, we met three years ago on a Tuesday and the high was 84 and you were wearing a green sweater and you said you got it from the Gap for $14.99…. you STILL don’t remember?”
TOTALLY! Except I never remember the weather.
Ben // June 25, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Christmas-themed spy movies?
I’m so there.
Sounds like a plan!
Howling Hill // June 25, 2008 at 12:57 pm
I often hear the “I know you from somewhere” or “your face is really familiar to me” lines. I caulk it up to having a soul that’s been around for a couple (thousand?) centuries.
Or I have reoccurring facial features seen on lots of others.
I like the first theory better.
The first theory is one I’m not familiar with. I have a feeling the second one is the one I go with. All white people look alike, anyway.
bing // June 25, 2008 at 1:04 pm
Maybe you have a secret twin that you don’t know about…hey, it’s sounds espionagey.
Those poor kids! They are screwed for the rest of their lives with no science lessons…eek!
I’ve always wanted a secret twin. That way we can prove how evolution works!
Tara // June 25, 2008 at 1:42 pm
You were on Rescue Me? That’s so cool.
‘Twas no big thing…
Pants // June 25, 2008 at 1:54 pm
I don’t know about you, but being conned into candle/jewelry/purse parties make me feel like getting into an altercation.
The creationist’s kids sound hilarious…but that’s probably just because I didn’t have to meet them in real life.
Those kids were really cute. I think the home schooling makes them deal with adults more easily than they do with kids.
freeandflawed // June 25, 2008 at 3:04 pm
Swing dance class?! How fun!!!
Hey, don’t I know you from…
No, it’s from that other thing.
Ann // June 25, 2008 at 3:16 pm
I didn’t realise Ned Flanders was on your swim team. Cool.
I vaguely remember episode 209 of Rescue Me - will have to go back and check it out.
Handlebar mustache and all. And episode 2009 is airing on FX on the 29th…
Anika // June 25, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Oh, to be a spy! It’s also my dream job. What, however, is a “candle party”? I’ve never attended one. Do you buy candles, make candles, or smell candles?
A candle party is where you go to someone’s house and get a sales pitch on buying candles. Like a Tupperware party, but less useful.
Kristabella // June 25, 2008 at 5:38 pm
Your last example, happens to me all the time. In fact, a guy at work (AT WORK!) did it to me three times in the span of three weeks. Dude, I know we were drinking beer but I’m 6-feet tall and not horribly unattractive in a company full of MEN! How can you not remember me???
Yeah, it makes you want to pierce the bridge of your nose or something.
Adorable Girlfriend // June 25, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I get that line of “I swear I know you” or “You remind me of someone” all the time.
Whatever. I laugh it off and then introduce myself later at the event/party, etc. to others who I have yet to meet at said function with a totally different name just to mess with ‘em.
That is so devious!
Sobe // June 25, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Next time you meet her, introduce yourself as Summer, Summer Squash.
I like it.
Stefanie // June 25, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Somewhere along the line, I switched from being the girl no one ever remembers meeting to being the girl who never remembers the people she meets. All right; that’s not ENTIRELY true, but I do feel my brain failing me entirely more often than I’m comfortable with lately. Damn aging process.
Yeah, I think there are a bunch of people I’m starting to forget. But only the important ones that I should have remembered.
Aaron // June 27, 2008 at 11:51 pm
You can have your book job AND be a secret agent, Christmas Tree. I’m just saying. The bookselling could be your cover. And then there will be a big controversy when I out you, Valerie Plame-style, a few years from now.
Actually: Maybe From Christmas Tree with Love is my Script Frenzy project for next year. My God, Christmas, you’re a genius!
jennifer // July 12, 2008 at 1:52 am
Double O Tannenbaum? *giggles* When sneaking up on someone? You, my dear, are silly. And I dearly love silly!
You know, for a Conservative Christian, this post is like walking into a party at the Playboy mansion. My Eyes are all big. Mouth a perfect O. (Like they haven’t seen THAT at the Playboy mansion before) But it is a lot of fun to come and read you! It just is, differences in our beliefs, or not. And I appreciate it when you come by and see me too. Which has been, er, much more often than I have visited. You’re a good and patient blog bud!
Oh! And 6 days BAY-bee. On the 7th He rested. SPOKE it all into being He did.
Are you big eyed and O mouthed yet?
Jen
Leave a Comment