The Daily Tannenbaum

Swimmies

June 20, 2008 · 20 Comments

I won’t be around the internet today or this weekend, because I’m on my way to Vermont for my second ever swim meet! Hooray! Finally, a way to quantify all my hard swimming work!

At my first meet in March, I swam in 3 whole races. This time, I’m swimming in five, and, as I’ve mentioned previously, in a long-course 50 meter pool.

These are the events I’ve signed up to do, and the seed times I made up for myself:

  • 100 meter breast stroke, 2:10.95
  • 400 meter freestyle, 7:51.09
  • 200 meter freestyle, 3:25.61
  • 100 meter backstroke, 1:52.74
  • 100 meter freestyle, 1:31.25

Since I’ve never swam in a long-course race before, my seed times are made up based on the times of the slowest swimmer in my coach’s high school swim team.

Because there are only 8 lanes in a pool, only 8 swimmers can go at once. Hence, you have heats that usually go from slowest swimmers to fastest. Making a good seed time is important, because you want to be in a competitive heat, otherwise the timing of the meet gets all off. Although, having a slow seed time and beating the pants two sizes too small swimsuits off everyone in your heat does feel good.

(Many coaches encourage their swimmers to get suits that are two sizes too small, because it sucks in all that jiggly fat which can slow you down. But that doesn’t solve the problem of the excess fat squeezing out the sides. No wonder the host team of this meet call themselves “The Muffintops.”)

Recently, Mickey asked the burning question, “if freestyle is the fastest stroke, why would you swim anything else?” Good question, Mickey.

The answer is… Oh my God, what in the world is that on your ceiling?

Moving on.

Just kidding. Personally, I swim backstroke so I can understand what it feels like to be waterboarded, and I swim breast stroke because that whip kick feels so good on my bum knees. I’m not swimming butterfly yet, but when I do, it will be… Uh, actually, I don’t know why I would do that.

If you’re still with me here, and you’re dying to know how I do on my races on Saturday and Sunday, I’m going to update my results to Twitter. (You don’t need an account to view my site.) Or, if you’re really hard core or my mother, let me know, and I can send you text messages directly! Woo hoo. Ta!

Categories: Obey Your Masters
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