Most of you know or figured out that “Noelle Tannenbaum” is not my real name. You may also have figured out that I don’t use my real name on the blog out of respect for the member of the Canadian Parliament who shares the exact same combination of vowels and consonants on her driver’s license. I’d hate for people to type in her name into Google looking for information on her health care plan and instead find a blog about one girl’s struggle with a broken ankle.
The reason I bring this all up is that I’m about to share with you a story I wrote in First Grade called “The Great Oz Trip.” You can see two versions of my real name in the pictures of the book. One is the name on my birth certificate, the one that I go by now. The other is the one that I was and still am called by everyone who knew me before I went to college and finally started using my real name. Just thought I should clarify that. If I felt comfortable using my real name here, there would be some killer blog posts about how odd it is to have everyone suddenly call you by a new name, and how annoying it is that more than 75% of the people in the world can’t tell the difference between names that start with “Carol” and end with “yn” or “ine.” It’s uncanny, really. But that’s neither here nor there. Let me instead proceed with the story, with a warning that this is copyrighted material that came right out of my seven-year-old head. Any similarity between this story and any other story is purely coincidental.
The Great Oz Trip by ~Noellie Tannenbaum~ (this was indubitably written in my mother’s hand.)
The Great Oz Trip by ~Noelle Tannenbaum~
Copyright 1985
Once I had a very Scary dream. I thought a cyclone blew me away. I was scared when I landed because I saw little yellow men. They said, “We are the winkies. We will bring our king the tinwoodsman.” When the tinwoodsman came out he said, “Is this return to oz?” “No” said the yellow winkies. This is ~Noelle~. She came here by cyclone.
The tinwoodman suggested I Should go to Glenda the good witch of the South. The yellow winkies Suggested I should go to her too. Then when I got there Glenda Said, “At 2:00 there will be a cyclone going to Kansas.”
“Kansas!” I screamed, “I want to go to New Jersey!” Glenda said, “The Cyclone that is going to New Jersey is coming in 12 years. I will make the poppy field disappear. You can go through there and follow the yellow brick road till you get to the oz airport.”
I ran past everything till I came to a very poor house. The good witch of the north came out and said, “This was Dorothy’s house. You may live in it.” I didn’t want to live in it I told her I was on my way to the oz airport.
She said, “The oz airport was wrecked 7 years ago.” Then the next morning Somebody said, “Wake up!” I woke up and my dad said, “We’re going somewhere else for breakfast.”
I told my family all about the dream and I made a book about my dream and that is the book you just read!
The End
And that is my first published work. I hope you enjoyed. Your critiques are welcome in the comments.
Posted by Aaron on January 20, 2008 at 11:58 am
Oh man, this just induced some serious grade school bookmaking nostalgia.
Also, I have to say, I was fairly relieved that things turned out okay for our protagonist. At one point, it looked like there was a very dark, ironic ending in store for her.
Posted by -R- on January 20, 2008 at 12:06 pm
“Kansas! I want to go to New Jersey!” was my favorite part.
It’s so cool that they based a movie on the book you wrote when you were 7!
Posted by stefanie on January 20, 2008 at 12:09 pm
I love that there were scheduled cyclones sweeping through Oz as a valid travel mode, but I think my very favorite part was the last page, when you told us that after your adventure, you wrote a book about it, and it was the book we just read. I’m all about extra clarity, of course.
Posted by nancypearlwannabe on January 20, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Yeah, I loved the part where you screamed “Kansas!” like it was the most ridiculous you’d ever heard. Because why would there be a cyclone to Kansas and not one to New Jersey?
Posted by Anika on January 20, 2008 at 4:28 pm
That is so very charming, and I’m so glad you shared it! I just love that you were going to have to live in Dorothy’s house for 12 years – that’s so clever. I think you should now write a sequel . . .
Posted by 3carnations on January 21, 2008 at 8:23 am
I heard the Oz airport was rebuilt a few years ago…
Incidentally, I had a friend in high school with an older sister named Caroline, but she pronounced it Care – o- lynn, and I never understood why it wasn’t pronounced Care – o – line. Does that make me a part of the population that doesn’t understand the difference…Because in that case, there was no difference, and I didn’t understand…
Posted by mickey on January 21, 2008 at 8:45 am
Cute. If you jazz it up a bit, I bet you could get Michael Jackson, Diana Ross and Nipsey Russell to star in a film adaptation. That would be cool.
Posted by EvilKate on January 21, 2008 at 8:47 am
My favorite part was the Kansas/Jersey line too.
And really, let’s talk about those illustrating skillz!
Posted by lizgwiz on January 21, 2008 at 10:55 am
You were very stylish in your overalls.
The “Kansas!” line was fabulous, indeed. I mean, who wants to go to Kansas, where everything is sepia-toned?
Posted by Laurel on January 21, 2008 at 11:37 am
This should go on the shelf alongside my first published book of short stories, which includes “Me and My Dinosaur” and “Me and My Sis.” (My sister and I can still repeat most of the story I wrote about the two of us.)
Thank goodness you woke up before you had to deal with the wrecked Oz airport… airline customer service is so bad in cases like this!
Posted by gregorymeyer on January 21, 2008 at 12:13 pm
Priceless, Noelle! If someone in the Oz airport starts talking about their winkie, you tell them to cyclone off to New Jersey! I’m just sayin…be careful. also, may i please be in the sequel? i rock a lion costume,
Posted by Sobe on January 21, 2008 at 12:23 pm
This has nothing to do with anything because I’m really behind in my blogs but I just changed my Yahoo IM status message to “Going Birmingham” … yes, I am going to clean up my house. It’s my own private Idaho, I mean therapy.
I never saw that Idaho movie. I don’t like potatoes, didn’t think I’d like the movie.
Posted by Allie on January 21, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Wow! That’s awesome! I especially liked the twist at the end. How cool that you still have the book!
Posted by Jennifer M. on January 21, 2008 at 3:47 pm
Wow, your first-grade self had some opinions on the state of Kansas and the state of Dorothy’s house!
Posted by courtney on January 22, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Nice! I’m glad you and the tinwoodman made it out okay.
Posted by katie on January 22, 2008 at 5:54 pm
In my professional opinion, you were an above average first grade writer. My first grade published story, “The Runaway Shoes” cowers in shame.
Posted by rdl on January 22, 2008 at 10:49 pm
I love it!! first fairytale i’ve read with New Jersey.
Posted by supersobe on January 23, 2008 at 9:03 am
Your name isn’t Noelle Tannebaum? Sweet Jesus, what next? FunkyCarter isn’t funky? EvilKate isn’t evil?