The Daily Tannenbaum

Monday, May 7
7:00AM - my alarm goes off, I scrape the cat off my face and get up. I briefly consider going back to bed for the rest of my day, but a grain of thought in the back of my head reminds me there is something to live for today. I try to think of it as I go downstairs to feed the living histamine.

7:15 - As I pour the raisin bran, it hits me: today is free pizza day at Planet Fitness! A day I’ve been waiting for since… Monday, April 2nd. I eat my cereal, but nothing’s going to satisfy me today unless it’s covered in cheese.

7:20 - Covering my raisin bran in cheese was a bad idea. I make some oatmeal instead.

8:00 - 5:00 - Nothing really important happens. (ie. work)

5:01 - I’m in the car on the way to the gym!

5:20 - At the gym, I decide to concentrate on my abs. As I’m lying on the mat, I do some quick calculations and decide that twenty-five sit-ups equals one slice of pizza.

5:25 - mmmmm… mushroom pizza

5:55 - I guess, since I’m here and all, I should do a few weights. Ten bicep curls (on each arm!) and 15 reps of lat pulldowns, that equals about a slice of pizza.

6:05 - mmmmm…. cheese pizza. A little cold, though.

6:35 - I should probably wait for the warm pizza. I feel a little awkward sitting here waiting, I should do something instead of just sitting here. I’ll do 20 minutes of elliptical, that’ll burn calories equal to a slice of pizza, I’m sure.

6:55 6:50 - It’s not my fault that the pizza guy came in 15 minutes, and I’d hate for that pizza to get cold while I’m here walking in place. I should go get it now.

6:51 - mmmmm… vegetable pizza.

7:30 - Back home again. That workout made me thirsty, I think I’ll have a soda. Maybe two.